Until the End of Time
by Maddycat2000
Summary: SPOILERS! He has been taken away, until the head of time. But how shall it pass?
1. I am here

**Until the End of Time**

**Chapter One -I am here**

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Farid. That is why I am here, in this cold, sad place. The white women did bring Farid back, as I asked in return. I didn't expect anything different. It has gone just as it did in the story. Now I just must wait until the end of time. Whenever that is. The white women seem to lose no interest in the blazes of fire that I continue to conjure.

At first when I came I half expected to see the man in the story, but I do not. I suppose it was just another story, most likely put together by Fenoglio. Was this another one of his plans? To have Farid killed by none other than Basta? No, he couldn't have. He needs Meggie to bring them into this story.

Meggie. I remember her sad face as Farid had fallen to the ground. She really is growing to look like her mother. She looked almost as lost as I had.

What are they thinking? What are they doing? Are they cursing me for leaving them? Maybe Roxanne is, I couldn't blame her. Will I really be able to keep my promise? To find my way back to her? It seems like a hopeless day dream at the moment. No, I don't suppose I will ever see her again. At least not until the white women come for her.

When will that be? When will I see them all again? Will I even see them? I'm not sure if Resa, Meggie or Silvertongue would come here as they are not from this damned book.

It is so cold. It felt good at first, the slight cooling chill, but as I stay, I feel myself inching closer to my own fire I have made. It burns through the night, if it is night as I assume. I cannot tell. The outside world is hidden from me, as if I am blindfolded.

Was it worth it? I am not sure. At the moment I cannot fully comprehend what I have done. I still have a small hope inside of me that all of this was a dream. Some crazy dream that I will wake up from any minute now, but the nightmare lurks on.

Roxanne. How I wish to see her face. I have left her again, the guilt pangs at my heart. It hurts, but there is no going back. I hope she understands that I would do the same for her. I hope she does not take out her anger at me for leaving her on Farid, though I fear she might. I wish I could have spoken with her one last time, and explained to her why I had to. However I could do no such thing, she would have held me back from what I had to do, what I did do.

Was it the right thing to do? Did I make a wise decision? I do not know. I must not let myself think of such things, they will only lead to self-pity and regret which I must admit that I may already be feeling.

A burst of flame eats at my arm for a moment as I have not been paying full attention to it. Surprisingly I do not draw back or wince. It's a slight relief to feel warmth again. Yes, it hurt as well, but at least it reminds me that I am here, this is real. Just as real as I am at least. I finally gain control of the flames again.

The white women do not care about the burn left on my left arm. There is no risk of losing me, there is no second death, just added pain. I take a moment to stop and look at my arm, but the women give me harsh glares, they want their entertainment. I hold back from showing the pain growing in my left arm on my face and start to call the flames to me once more.

I take my time getting used to it here, for I will be here for as long as time goes on, just as I promised when I summoned them.

But how much longer until the end of time?

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_I have just finished reading the second book, Inkspell. I really wanted to know what Dustfinger was feeling so I decided to write a Fic on it. I hope you all like it as much as I do myself. I'll try to update. I actually find it very easy to write in this one. The words flow from my head to the page. I doubt many will read this, but I don't care so much. I like this one and if others do its a bonus. If you do read this please review. I really want feed back. Evenif its feed back that you didn't like it, tell me why! _

_Thanks for taking a look,_

_Maddycat2000_


	2. Numb

**Until the End of Time **

**Chapter Two -Numb**

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Slow. That is the speed of this place. Days drag on and on, all of them the same. I have lost track of the date, but what does it matter to me now? I am dead, why should I worry about such things? It's not as if that will make anything go faster. It almost makes me miss Silvertongue's world, almost. 

Thinking. There seems nothing more to do. I ponder on and on over matters that I cannot change. Over things that are hopeless to dream about. As hopeless as they are, they are all that I have to hold onto. Little memories cling with me, its curious how the mind keeps such small details, but lets go of so many other things that you find yourself wishing to remember clearly. Such silly things seem to strike hope into my heart.

My heart. Is it right to keep calling it that? I have left my body, so is it correct to still call it my heart? My heart that ceases to beat inside myself? It seems easier to believe Farid's stories now. Particularly the one about nightmares. I find myself missing the familiar beat of it.

Messed up. Its all been messed with. I was supposed to have been killed by one of Capricorn's men, not this way, I read the words myself. Would it really have made a difference, though? Would I really feel more secure here if I had not been here on the same terms that I am here for now? I doubt it. I should get used to it, I would have to, even if I had gone that way.

Was it right? Again, I am not sure. My whole life seems to be an upside down dream as I look back at it now. Fenoglio must have had some fun, making all of this up. Yes, I still hold onto the bitterness that I feel for him, the damned writer. Does he see what he has done, the power of his own words?

Maybe not his words. I read my own fate and it has turned out differently. What of this _was_ his idea? Did he plan this wretched place I find myself in now? The thought sends a chill through my spine. I have come accustomed to this feeling, it seems like I have it all the time now. That is the feeling of this place.

Numb. Yes, that describes it well. It's as though all your feelings are numbed. Even your mind. Almost like a drug, a slow drug. One that has no high to it, no appeal. Even the fading scar on my left arm seems dulled, dulled pain.

Panic, that is what I would have expected, but no, not even a bit of it. A cooling fear is more like it. It's slightly tiring. You start to forget your reasons for wanting to live in the first place, almost, but not quite. Just enough of the memory stays to laugh in your face. Laugh at how pathetic you are, how much you miss those people and places, they seem perfect now, compared to this.

I've taken it for granted. All of it. Even the years in that other world. At least Resa had been there.

Resa. I try to shake this thought from my head. I start to feel guilt for even thinking the name. I do not blame Meggie for disliking it when I talk of her. I find myself disliking it at times. However, Roxane is here. No, that is wrong to say. I am alone in this place, even if it is my own world.

Alone. Very alone. It pains me to be reminded of this yet again. The silence is deafening. I must hold back from screaming, screaming so loud that maybe, just maybe, someone could hear me. But of course no one would. I have the lurking suspicion that this has to do with the white women. How else would it be that I have not seen or heard anyone, but them?

Is it just that I am a special case? After all, I did not really _die_. I was taken from my own body, I had of course agreed to it. I knew where they would bring me, I had no idea it would be like this, though.

How much longer until the end of time?

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_Thanks for reading the second chapter. This one went pretty easly like the first chapter did, I felt a little ify about how I worded some things, though. I hope it turned out alright as I believe it did. My little prediction was right, not many reviews at all, but I'm not really too sad about it. If you are reading this through, please do review though. _

_I tried to show the feeling of it there. I percepted that it'd be a cold, numb, tired place. I hope I showed it throught this chapter._

_Keep reading,_

_Maddycat2000_


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